In browsing my bookshelves after I decided I was a knitter, I found I have a copy of Wild Knitting, a 1979 tome I no doubt got from a bargain table. I wasn’t a knitter when I bought it, so whether I’d make any of the projects wasn’t a factor in deciding to bring it home with me–I was looking for color combinations and other design ideas I might use in quilts. Good thing, too, because there are exactly two patterns in the whole book that I’d consider knitting up. The rest of them are too wild for me.
Here’s the aptly name “Forget-me-not Bikini”. Well, yes, it would be easy to remember anyone wearing something that showed that much skin. Also, I can’t imagine the breast flowers would stay in place if one moved at all, much less tried to go swimming, so that no doubt would add to the memorableness factor.
These bib overalls are best used as quilt design inspiration rather than clothing to be worn out in public–unless you are a clown or want to draw attention to your hips and thighs by making them look nice and wide and colorful. The Plain Spoken pattern from the Modern Quilt Workshop book looks something like these overalls, actually–see here for Kim’s version.
Stoles made out of animals–especially with the heads left on–are kind of weird and creepy, even if the animal in question is a knitted armadillo. Maybe particularly if it’s an armadillo, because the only way it got that flat was being run over by a car, and who wants to wear roadkill?
The award for pattern I am least likely to knit goes to the “Look Ma, No Underwear” dress. That’s not what the book calls it, but I can’t imagine why not. It doesn’t look like you could even walk in this–it’s got to be tied tightly to stay on, obviously–but maybe it’s very stretchy. I don’t intend to find out.
I also don’t intend to make a blue sweater large enough for me and several of my friends to wear at the same time, giant fruit floor pillows, the crown jewels, or a child’s raincoat with strips cut from plastic bags. I might, just might, make a sweater with colorful four-patches on it. If I change the colors just a bit, it would go very nicely with the Hogwart’s school scarf (as seen in Goblet of Fire) that I’m intending to make someday.
One year ago, I shared the first quilt I ever made.
Two years ago, I gave myself a weekly report card. So conscientious.
Three years ago? Skiing, not writing.
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